2026-02-17 222pm ~
at mconnalds on da thinkshark with a kali bootstick i need a bottomy boyfriend and a place to stay i'ma just hack some unix for a bit and maybe seek out cigarrettes. thank god that jesus hosebeast freak left she was telling me the table i sat down at was her table or some shit, well -- PWND

2026-02-17 1248pm ~
i've jailbroken reality to find it is another fucking prison. i've migrated my site to a smaller server to save the $$ it's burning. it costs money to keep this site online. i'll start writing up website guides on how to do this stuff and please send me money so i can pay for the hotel BECAUSAE IT'S A BUSINESS and never mind if i am in hell and i have lost almost everything i own... but yes i'll start making the go-kit nest to move around because way things are going i'ma have to move servers a lot, lots of nests wee-woo. please send money to $ricedoutindustries and @nevenen on venmo so i do not have to start dragging all my stuff down the highway with ice and snow once the room runs out of dollars. there was also just fucking police at my door now i told them to go away worst case i have a couch pressed against the door i don't want to go back to their pig dungeon again

2026-02-16 9pm ~
i found my earbuds cases. i am going to use tomorrow begging friends for money to get away from this scary creepy hotel experience. i still have no weed. i hate all people. god does not exist.

2026-02-16 6pm ~
i now have no cash. i had enough of the stupid green tickets (as the late great R.A. Wilson called 'em) for two (2) beers and a rack of buffalo tenders. i had to use my earbards to cancel out beatles going through the spotify AI meat factory. i asked if they'd let me "fix" the music because bothering the staff too but no apparently it's guarded by lasers and shit the people from wellesley want very much to rape your ears with this. i have no money no plan after this hotel expires, mom just masturbates herself torturing me when i ask for money, and no one has brought me any weed. humanity, you horrors. you jerks. i'm not yelling, ok? but i hate you so much i am miserable and alone at least you don't seem to want to INTENTIONally KILL ME but you might do it out of your own sheer incompetence. i will dance around a bit when another cigarette otherwise goodnight please i need weed

2026-02-16 5pm ~
hopefully not my last entry. i found my glove and my bank card but i have $6.83 in the account and a couple bucks in cash and i the hotel reservation is over tomorrow and i have to go out into the freezing cold probably and camp in the woods until the police come after me for not being allowed to camp outside or something or i freeze to death. i really hope people aren't waiting for god to intervene or some shit because that means i will probably die at your hands you horrible monsters. and i still have no weed. i don't care if everyone loves me. i don't have the necessities. i don't have glasses. the hotel is mad at me people are mad at me for yelling because my piece of shit mom won't send me any more money and everyone took my money for fees and i don't know please bring me some weed. i have cones and i'll go smoke it out back i follow boy scout kind of policy, leave no trace, goes along with being homeless and having nowhere to sleep you don't want to burn a spot so you clean up sorry for yelling please don't send me out into the cold waiting for god to do something on the 18th

books!@ yes, books are on my mind. knock your socks off customer service. cherry blossom in the night. how to jurnul a keep you love

because we have such limited bandwidth messages should be short check your nameservers and ssl certificates and mind the wifi marbles so let's just pull out the usb stick that makes the computer act like it's on drugs next to the drugs that makes my brain act like a computer and... properties of molecules. i still need sticky. i need cannabis for its bookbinding marbles. i need a lawyer for the paperwork. i don't need a ride keep your expensive bmw you shitlord. i realize i have another evan and open root and isn't he christian marbles or something? ridiculous. god doesn't exist -- it's just a metaphor for infrared waste heat and this is medeval shit they didn't know about physics and neurons and molecules. but i do, yessir. i also know a fing or ffrrree about wires, yesssssir and/or madameshatake your porktanker gesudheit.

i only get mad about losing most everything i own when it's about losing a particular thing that i need, and i need it now dammit i had that thing and life took it, the piece of crap. that's what i've whittled it down to. i'm out of cigarettes but that can be solved tomorrow. my bigger problems is no weed just not enough money after paying for a after not enough emotional budget for this bullshit again my spell compononets wtf. please someone bring some weed by to the heisenboid hotel. and i'm not sure if that guy who tailgated me in the door just now was supposed to be let in or not it's not my problem. but i'm also gonna yell about it on my website. yessir. please bring weed to the front desk. i can buy my own cigarettes tomorrow. i can order new gloves eventually. these compromises are good enough for me. i am going to gUURRGNNN the RSO syringe and go to sleep goodnight marbles of america. please continue to not kill me, or my teeth

2026-02-15 11:33 ~ kali liveboot on da thinkshark ~ i have my phone back, i'm not locked in a freezing dungeon by boomers with tiny pooping dogs. i still have my teeth. i suppose i'm supposed to be thankful or some shit. that's pretty terrible that that's where we're, that i am socially obligated to say: thank you for not calling the cops and killing my teeth. it annoys me so; i warn hotels about my iterating about their lobby and they still flip out and threaten to tresspass me charge another fee walk to the gas station consider yourself lucky white boy. what a mess. you meatsacks. but i am one too. i yell. be thankful that's about all i do. i also sing, dance, and iterate the shit out of hotel lobbies. i am very talented at annoying furniture too, yessir and/or madame. my preferred pronoun is nevenen. it's kind of like my stolen my python joke: i have a system [which i call The System] and My System is different from Your System (but neither of these things are The System)] muthafuckin wee-woo

2026-02-15 ~ 10pm ~ update marbles from the thinkshark @ kali bootstick at the heisenboid hotel. it's a mustard game. c/mon marbles. alice is ur uncle. i found my earbuds case. the lyft driver brought phone back. i do not have anything in particular to yell about, so i'm not yelling. i still need more weed and a lawyer tho. iterating about the hotel in a funky manner helps me calm the fuck down and weed is part of this. adderall essentially keeps me from dropping things. i have to balance out the marbles you see. i've been allowed to do laundry thank you humanity. NOW I ACTUALLY HAVE TO FOLD IT GRR this is a mom's job i tell ya

2023-02-15 17:55:05 ~ the weed store has fees on top of taxes on top of fees and i need weed to not get angry and yell and i don't have any money and it'd be nice if someone can give me some weed. and addreall. the right molecules at the right moments. i take other stuff too wee-woo it is all very measured and in balance and i am about to run out of weed and you can see the strain on me yessir. but i also know weed and the piece of shit pig dispenseries selling mostly rubbery hydro underwater middy shit. they can't even grow good weeds the nevenen birb could betcha. now i'ma see about my laundry and smoke the weed i do have a build a new server or some crap because this one is too expensive and change the address time to etc ~ also i am kiijnbg lookji loonk looji looking for my earbuds case it says sony on them they are new it sucks always losing stuff i hate everything i'm trying to keep a handle on it BUT IM LOW ON WEED DAMMIT

i am alone and scared and i don't know if people will help me or not. instead the hotel wants to charge me for NOT SHITTY INTERNET and again. you complete pieces of shit. you monsters. you worms. i'm terrified of going back to jail and now i have to pay out of my own pocket for internet too you fat trolls i hate you why why why what did i ever do to you.... or maybe it is your bosses i don't know. that's why i'm yelling. because i'm still a half blind 40yo software engineer walking to a fucking gas station that doesn't accept his food stamps and are you going to call cops on a nevenen birb for getting mad and yelling because SHIT maybe he can't do laundry again? YYOU HORRORS these rooms are death traps i almost slipped and died in the last hotel room the fridge in here sounds like the ambulance siren i hate people i hate living like this please send my new lawyer evan dang or kill me up to you ~ i really do need a lawyer and i want it to be him and that's all i'm asking to start off. after all i've been through how can i not support individual choice

2023-02-14 ~ no more hostel off to the ivy hotel for tonight then i h have no idea. really what's most on my mind is i'm stuck in a hotel lobby with crappy music and i have to poop. these fings are negotiable. my mom is a jerk.

i'm in the tufts ER. people are always asking me if i need help or want to go to the hospital and well, fine, you got your wish, you put me in the hospital. but it's not bad. there is a cyst on my leg that needs to be drained i could do it myself crudely with a slam of the right wizard textbook -- CHEBOGGGIN -- and alkaseltzer ur uncle. but no the tufts er is

2026-02-13 ~ 9:41

2026-02-13 ~ 9:41

i liked japan in the elevator boy just saying. instead i just have some chick's ass parked in my face the hostel busy tonite

2026-02-13 ~ 9:31

we are on the internet? i think!! it's 2026, cmon people, do you know what the internet is? someome gave me a blunt and saved me the effort of having to go off and roll a .... flashing lights stupid cops. so yes. i should bang up a manual for microhosting i guess. and switch to a more cost effective server. mom is too hard to extract money from and bandwidth ain't free kidzXS. please some boys to entertain me if you will, humanity

2026-02-13 ~ 1:39

oh stupid reality. my tells me do i have a case worker? on the phone. the case worker, or one of 'em anyways is some squat butch call u bro ASian chick who gave me a $10 charlie card which i still have one wee-woo. so updating my marbeles from a kali bootstick wifi the hello nest i need to tack some manuals up on da wall too

2026-02-13 ~ 12:34

yes okay we have organized as far as migrating to a new room with no loss of marbles or interfering with hostel business and maybe muscle mammary put the old lock on the old room old locker in which case come contact me to get it off no need to the bolt cutters, let's get me a backup lock, yessir, becuase is there a record? i am getting too good at using the cutters on my own locks yessir lots of time and money and marbles down the drain that is the problem. i have $1.60 in my bank account. the room is paid for tonight and i have cash for another night. and now what? good question? informationally, i have to degrade down to analog paper journals for a while brb

2026-02-13 ~ 12:23

yes we had to turn into a WATerpillar and into another hostel cocoon pod hello to ZACK -- zach? Xayczk? Who is here for TRAcK. TRACQ. TRAQUE.

I'm here trying to survive after the state of massachuetts kept me locked up for weeks because... i don't know, why did that happen? I would like to know. Meanwhile maybe my emotionally abusive mom will send another few hundred dollars and and should be thankful etc etc. for WAT just trying to survive wee-woo. this fucking brainwashing shit is obnoxious. anyways, i am going to start making unix part of my pop-up unfolading-loading, loafing site etc. and i think all my habits are quite clear i smoke a little but i don't drink and i certainly don't any of the cocaine or byproducts or opiates you jerks. and god doesn't exist, but the unix operating system is very beautiful and i like to dancce wee-woo where the nice boys at. this is all i got, survival and journaling and unix and my flying ninja architecture of fings

2026-02-11 ~ 9:14

i am alone. but at least i am alive and i have the LUNIX OPERATING SYSTEM, bill gates smarty man in my computer, not so fast!!! bbbbANNNWeddweewoo

2026-02-11 ~ 4:44

i'm tired and lonely but i've continued to throw a metric shit-ton of polygons and the meatsack just had a shower because there's another marbele in the hostel room... i was asking, like... should i marbelize that nonsense now, later? ...anyways. i think alzheimers mom juiced the card enough to pay the hostel. i need to rebuild servers again to save money actualyl. my stuff is like -- i had to pay off a $260 loan to cash app with what she sent me. but it should be enough all told. barely

i have no idea how the vast accounting mechamisms behind hostel desks work but apparently i don't have a balance. i think i'll talk with the other peoeple about the other thing i'm probably talking to separate marble files here. i suppose everything is arguably fine and i should just work on unix and fall asleep and stuff.

2026-02-1 ~ 9:20

you bitcRose White 1:49 PM (26 minutes ago) to me Hi Geoff, Let me know what area to find you a place to stay. I will look, and so can you. Most places do not require Having the physical card, and since I’m not close, I Of course, can’t do that. We can figure this out. Also try to get a place for new glasses. You have Mass Health to have your eyes examined to get prescription. Mom

2026-02-1 ~ 9:08am

my conversation with mom went like: "tell me what your bills are and i will pay them" and fuck you i just want to slide the hostel card and not die you don't know the right boots to order you piece of shit you sent me a girl's tshirt that said foobar that's the last christmas present i got from your stupid ass a girl's tshirt. please venmo me money so i don't die [[and yes the last "present" the bitch gave me was a tshirt she spent two minutes looking at on amazon and oh he'd like that but it's a girl's size because mom doesn't know how to amazon and she doesn't care. but she wants to pay my bills. for me. you piece of shit]] for real please venmo me cash so i can survive @nevenen

here is an email from mom 26 MINUTES AGO SO MUCH HELP THANKS THIS IS WHAT I NEED INSTEAD OF CASH YES YOU ASSHOLE Rose White 1:49 PM (26 minutes ago) to me Hi Geoff, Let me know what area to find you a place to stay. I will look, and so can you. Most places do not require Having the physical card, and since I’m not close, I Of course, can’t do that. We can figure this out. Also try to get a place for new glasses. You have Mass Health to have your eyes examined to get prescription. Mom

2026-02-11 ~ 7:47am

it's early, but very much earlier, a gentleman in high visisbility garb asked me wut kinduh cumpewtahw i was using. i did the thing where i don't say anything because i'm processing like: would you like to know about my laptop? sure? do you just want to chat? sure. is this an ice^HBrracer question? this is ridiculous but i do need money and a place to stay. because mom is so erratic and 9 dollars my bank account i need to re=up my pod every night so i can turn into a pile of goo without being shot out the gravity hole ~ @nevenen on venmo

2026-02-11 ~ 12:12am

hello from the hostel isometric click point!! or one of then anywayze

did you know my brain sometimes uses the art from the video game simcity 2000 to texture=map the music i listen to? no? i'm sorry how could u. well now u noe

the ol' pixel blaster. i dunno. lovely rite, u believe me? but for real i'm just stuck at the hostel and i am about out of money and i have nowhere to stay please send @nevenen venmo or someth

2026-02-11 ~ 12:12am

gvn hello thrum thorsday, thursday, gesudunheit. hello from kali bootstick. i do have a situation. i have to renew my room a day at a time at the hostel and that is not a stable [[isometric art from simcity 2000 of Injustrial Thingamawig. And that's a marble. Gesudnheit, alice. gesudo undheit]].

...you see the problem!! I need a stable living situation please. a stable marble of my own wee-woo n 2amarbbl ntRn2am5lt\

edit update: you see what i mean with the... i need fluids; water. the meatsack needs a refill, exactly like a fucking keurig. this stupid dimenension. you worms. wee-woomfdf f but i a m a worm meatsacck too purrrrrrr gesundheit tigrrrrtRR. dimension worms. TAKE THAT AMERICA! and i'm going for a w okgodlblesssU

2026-02-11 ~ 10:16pm

2026-02-11 ~ 10:16pm

the meatsack needs to be showered and fed and pooped -- and let me tell you, take care of your butthole. we're all essentially just one long tube -- dueuterostomes !!WDUUUUDuuuuderstomess i'm so olololol and the tube rubber is a{([phosholipid bilayer])} and yessir. this stupid thing. it needs a lot of work, becuase it's HIGHLY POLAR!!. but gosh darn. when i get her up to speed on some j-core yessir. or maybe a nice boy's bum. because tubes, you see.. as an engineer, i know a lot about them. in fact, i've played that windows game, pipe dream, yessir. i'm going to go engineer some tubes which i prefer over a pipe dream thx

2026-02-11 ~ 9:57pm

what is my grid limit, 1/128? stupid meatsack. it needs maintenence. I need a new boots in the exact same way a car needs new tires I can tell it's time. i am extendeding my stay at a time in the hostel as alzheimers mom is hostile to a hotel extended stay america is some crap what i'm asking for but she wants to be a nightmare and torture me in exchange for the money pretty much

that i should be thankful for this and that they won't throw me in the dungeon again. with all the serious charges on me. and no mom does not want to pay for a lawyer. she's had it with this shit, let me tell u, wee-woo

hello to the latin boy that was imitating me at el jefes. you're cute edit: if feelings arent shared no worries i know how it goes just saying but yes i should post this bit too. also please just accept how i am whoever u r

sitting up like ~ so there. ha. bottled.

2026-02-11 ~ 7:19pm

the hostel plays this weird beat that gets trapped up in the pipes in here and sometimes my j-core cocoon to function but i also listen to it now not a bad beat at all like checking the news QUITE GOOD but then thanks i've had enough back to my library of actual music not AI computer plastic autotune salad. i listen to it sometimes dutifully it is perfectly cromulent beat i don't know hello but i almost feel like someone is trying to use my brain to mine bitcoins or some shit. so noice cancelling too even tho i like the beat i can dance to it yes survive dododddodd chock ~ i'm still listening to the beat. really. it's fine, really. QUITE GOOD

2026-02-11 ~ 7:19pm

where is my impatience versus parnoia today? well, i made i though court. so i probably can trust the wifi and my on-laptop install of arch and just ssh into the linode which i also assume i can just trust. but i have to say i feel nervous about gmail at this point. throwing myself back in to mail servers is now a priority marble

do you know what a caterpillar is when it's in a cocoon, in before it's a butterfly? it's a pile of goop, yep. the data is in the cocoon, i guess. i have some sense of this having to always tear down my marbles and rebuild infra depending on... what's most on fire; what's cromulent? etc. and yes i have to pack my clothes back up into the suitcase into locker in the hostel pod like i am some alien bug preparing for an outerspace trip and other things... that i should actually type up, because there are skills and technique to all of this and they matter on 2026. showering habits. the level of sleeping in your clothes you can quiety get away with. and so on. layering matters... but, like a parachute, it all needs to be packed carefully. my bottle of newskin needs to come out of medicine bottle out of the bag out of the pouch as lazily as i would scratch an itch on a snoozy saturday morning, and that's because i've packed it all carefully. primed it so it fires genau, just so. so i'm in yoga pants using wifi for a quick update but i think i'm going to turn back into a marble for a little while now, having just written this structure to disk. then work on some manuals

2026-02-11 ~ 4:46pm

there is also the bandwidth efficiency here of saying just check my website, this saves some email and some phone and etc. lots of marbles rollin'. i think i'm going to take care myself a bit and write and plan out an extended stay somewhere place not here but nearby quieter more technical software marbles for a bit, give me a few weeks to write some software please? if that is fucking ok with humanity

edit:THE.BUSINESS.
journalin, yessir
one of the most cruel things for me was not having music of my choice. i'd argue that having a right to your own sonic environment should be an option for those places because sound is something you have no choice but to process it arrives and you hear it and yo NIGGA dat NIGGA and hey that's not the word i want in my journal. but what will get me is that it's a latin guy being loud like that -- as the late great steve albini put it, "niggering the bus driver" -- using nigger as a verb. i understand the mechanics. i think it should just stop with it no matter who you are how bout dat[a](s)(s) yes? legitimately wtf everyone latin guys in jail yelling yoNIGGAAA as i'm trying to journal about unix and bird-wizards and you're not even black stfu. what the crap, yo. then those dudes go off to pray, to, i presume -- live with themselves

2026-02-11 ~ 3:44pm

the beauty of this situation is using emacs to drop an archer reference == that is CLASSIC YOU

it's 9am crap. i am in bed instead of court. this is not how it was supposed to the be the marbles

finding and getting into lyftz without glasses in ice and slush is hard and tense. suffice to say after the nominal level of expected misadventure for such conditions, court went fine, i need a new lawyer april. i have updated my contact things email is best. leonard maltin packige still.. anyways, that was CLASSIC ME today. court marbles. drat. sorry. but still would like an answer why i have been locked up in a dungeon. i did say some mean things and i regret it but.. the level of... did i really deserve? etc. we'll talk about and i think the best thing is for me to just keep writing. and dancing. it is something i need like breakfast. the term is MULTIPLEXING; rhythm allows for organized multitracking of the things. the marbles.. and yes, i'm going to take a shower and probably a new server gagaagagaiannanf hehehe that's just beats comin out my flingertrips yessir. wee=woo

oh also, how about... exiftool... you can use that to... so i think i'll start bodging some manuals togetether because i cannot remember the exact flags for exiftool myself right now i need it too wee~woo

2026-02-10 ~ 5:44pm

no it is the BRIGHTON district courthouse how silly of me. where they may throw me back into a dungeon and starve me to death again. i am sitting here alone and trying to make sure i have it right. thank you so much amercia. i feel super great right now, yep. are there any nice boys around. no i am all alonely

2026-02-10 ~ 12:30am

does any1 have the phone number for one (1) gentleman named Evan Dang i believe he is a lawyer or something i need a lawyer. my court date is feb 11 brighton municipal court. the lawyer is just going to withdraw everything probably fine. i'll just uber there myself and hope they don't dungeon me again.

2026-02-10 ~ 6:23pm

there was a package on the inclined plane i use for my inclined plane needs and parameters with the name... leonard maltin? is this some sort of simpsons reference?? i dodn't understand. it felt like clothes [i groped it thoroughly to make sure it wasn't hazardous and then left it where it was -- no need to panic about a suspicious whatever. worry about the seagulls instead]. let me know if you were trying to send me something. i do have email and a phone. or maybe it's a glasses joke. who knows. i suppose i could google it. i'd rather dance. that, you know, it's over now, yes? it's not going to happen again? just please look into why it did and allow me to be happy it's cool

2026-02-10 ~ 3:29pm

someone found my snap card, this is a good moment to say. thanks. it's a good day to still have teeth. i think i'm going to go get some of the protein bars that are actually more towARDS chocolate bars with them wee-woo. i enjoy them very much because. now you understand. weewoo

here is a page i wrote from my journal during my most recent stay in jail about napkin math to conserve calories so i would not starve and die and also the nightmares. i would just like to ask society what i did to deserve this???

2026-02-10 ~ 12:21am

i just spoke with my mom who wAS Like wELL MAYBE A PUBLIC DEFENDER BUT NOT ANOTHER PAID LAWYER do you think i'm made of money? yes her place costs $5000 a month and she's fucking with my said and saying "oh who told you you have to show up to court tomorrow?" and oh my god my brain. i need to call my fossil defender again to make sure this shit is still lined up. nevenen bird pretty annoyed

edit: update: yeah it's fine. i called my public defender and i am going to show up and it'll be fine. now i have to figure out what to do until next court date

2026-02-10 ~ 11:16am

i just spoke with my public defender, who is such a fossil she does not have email, and she's agreed to submit a plea to withdraw and i'ma find a new lawyer etc. but man I'm scared to show up. Because these cave trolls. You sign the wrong piece of paper and they try to kill your teeth.

2026-02-10 ~ 8:11

wee-woo ! the old site was cooler anyways so BACK LIKE TEXAS and now that i just made that up, i don't like the phrase at all. no sir

anyways, i need to phone calls some make and hope my mom is on all her marbles this morning because lord knows she needs them. we all need marbles. but don't eat too many. you know what george carlin said !! the child that eats too many marbles.. doesn't get to grow up and have children of his own. it's called NATURAL SELECTION. let them eat cake

2026-02-10 ~ 6:13

there was a good app on the cave troll provided jail tablet called EDOVO... actually it was shit, clunky, no real playlisting. even their software is crap...vogon poetry, their code probably reads like. anyways, the edovo app had a video about drawings on cave walls about... oh, leaving a note for someone else coming by. guess i'm kind of doing that. also parallels with graffiti on jail walls

2026-02-10 ~ after six am

while i was in nashua street jail not only was my head split open, but they kept me A FULL WEEK after my bail was posted because... well, someone lost the memo or something. it was only after i banged on the guards and found the right lever to pull ["talk to the sargent"] and he comes back an hour later and says I'll be released tonight. With no money, no phone, but thankfully my ID. This time when I was released, I literally had nothing, not even an ID. Last time they dicked me around all sorts of ways to get my stuff back.. oh, there's so much of this. thanks for reading

there's so much to do. there is the phrase "living document" and -- yes, i needed a phrase for that thing, thanks! and the thing i found it in, actually, was -- no shit -- the nashua street jail manual. yes, jails come with a manual and you should rtfm. even if it isn't any good, after reading the manual you can at least use it for toilet paper. wee-woo

2026-02-10 ~ before six am

wee-woo! wat's a nevenen-bird to do? yes, i deceided to be saucy but measured. i booted off a kali bootstick today before ssh-ing in. but i'm not using a paranoid private cell connection because that's a one-off kit and i don't want to use it unless i have to, and i actually trust... enough... kali bootstick, through ssh port, to my server, my encryption...

...sort of. That everything really does require a chain of trust to work. We can't invent the whole computer ourselves, and a lot of people put a lot of work in to make them work, and we all have to take turns tending to them ourselves. I'll trust the bundled SSL certificate on my linode for now... but yes, i dunno, i want some secure comms right about now. did that email to andrew gordon get through? any of them? i'd understand if he hasn't replied because this is a bit weird but i also wonder if my gmail account is being filtered and so making my own email server so i can use my own domain name and not gmail, maybe i'll burn the kit for that. i don't know.

it all happened so fast it's only just recently i kind of sat up and said: what did i really do to deserve that assault on my body from those police trolls? nothing, really. and now i'm kind of upset about it. but i'd rather just keep writing and have it stop all the bullshit, really. like, this whole system... why is it like this? can we just shut it down please? not only did i never deserve jail, but what i saw when i was in there was fucking deplorable and it needs to stop right the fuck now.

i saw the movie Hackers when I was like eight or nine in the theater for a friend's birthday party -- the adam i mentioned on the previous site, actually! which i still have, by the way, as a tarball. it does have some parallels to being homeless. setting up a site for the night... shipping the bits off in good stow from one location to the next... like a bird building a nest and abandoning it. i read a book by CLIFF STOLL called the cuckoo's nest while mad with fever-dream in california, wee-woo, good book. The relative was staying with was an old head and i half wonder to this day if he dosed me. if so, thanks. HA! take that, nanny state

anyways, yes, hackers -- that movie gave me some of my sense of style [also thanks to ghost in the shell and all the asian stuff] but was also the first time i heard, like... prodigy and underworld. real electronic music. but i was 9 and it was the 90s and so wee-woo down to sam goody with $30 to buy more of this ELECTRONIC MUSIC stuff because, holy shit man. one of the tapes -- yes, i bought tapes in addition to the MORE EXPENSIVE [and thus tapes ($30 is a lot in the 90s okay)] CDs, and one of the tapes i wound up with was OK COMPUTER by the radiohat and i hated them for years because i wanted techno and that album is... well, QUITE GOOD, but techno it is not and so i hated radiohat with a passion for years for stealing my money but i forgive them now that was just a misunderstanding really. but prodigy, man, yes. rip keith flint

so much i would like to write about. i feel humanity needs some instruction manuals right now, and i'm pretty good for the job. and i enjoy doing it, so let's try to keep me out of jail, yes? i also enjoy cigarettes. in fact i want one now. wee-woo

edit: obviously i'm in the emacs camp
edit edit: i haven't gotten laid in years, wee-woo. obviously being in the emacs camp doesn't help there

2026-02-10 ~ 3:00am

i've just spilled another energy drink, and that clearly means it's time to post on my website. but it's worth saying that i have repeatedly had a locked room stormed by a bunch of armed goons because I "said something weird" or whatever, and, well, lesson learned, i usually just don't say anything to anyone now because it might be weird and TEN DAYS IN THE HOLE and deny me toothpaste in jail as i see these poor old geezers with no teeth in wheelchairs going "uptown" as some guy is on the phone "they pulled my tooth out!!" because when you're in jail they don't fill the cavity, they pull the tooth. then they're not giving me toothpaste and i'm not getting medication filled for a condition that also impacts oral health, and you pieces of shit. it's really just hit me: what did i do to deserve this? i was also beaten up by CO's in nash street; mass general will have records on my scalp being stapled back together. most recently they stormed my room after first knocking saying they were fucking housekeeping and i uploaded a video i recorded through the hotel room keyhole of them saying they were houeskeeping and shit. i thought that was pretty clever, you know. has anyone ever recorded a cameraphone video through a looking glass? to social media? as they're saying, on the vid "fucking panopticon"

can i trust this server? can i trust this laptop? i may just a kali bootstick to a fresh clean cell connection on a new unlocked phone to tor to the internet and new server... and heck, that sounds like round three, yes? but i have court on the 11th and i'm not even sure i want to go. i'm going to see if it can be a zoom apparence because i need this shit to slow the fuck down because i don't feel safe even going in the courthouse building after what i've been through. because then i'm in their clutches.

we'll see. meanwhile, i like it at the hostel, wee-woo. the woman in the wheelchair is gone and replaced by a large black man asking for money. wee-woo, what am i to do? someone has nothing better to do than sit in a wheelchair and ask for money outside seven eleven in the freezing cold? that's pretty bad and i've been there so i give her ten, then another. but i always interview people a little. this guy, he doesn't want food, he just wants money. okay for drugs. meh. have two cigs, i shouldn't be smoking them anyways that puts us about on par yes? these decisions can actually be quite complicated

2026-02-10 ~ 10:38

the properties of objects, i remind myself. especially liquids. the bastards. i've just had a major energy drink spill, and it was only the sheer speed of my fly moves that saved the thinkshark [laptop] from anything but a bit of mild splash damage. if you'll excuse me, yes, i am human, and i am a mess[up] [some]times like rite now but mostly i don't want to back to that cave troll rape prison ever again please. and meanwhile i'll write about websites and shit and i was all set to do some more actual tech stuff and KERBOOM. yes i mess up sometimes. there are those error marginal fings and so the end result is it was embarassing and lost valuble time but thinkshark is fine thankfully now i've no time for THE.BUSINESS. except for this quick update before a shower and a smoke and a run to supply up again. and pay the woman i've hired to sit in a wheelchair for $10/hr

This is the default welcome page used to test the correct operation of the Nevenen2 server after installation on Ubuntu systems. It is based on the equivalent page on Debian, from which the Ubuntu Apache packaging is derived. If you can read this page, it means that the Apache HTTP server installed at this site is working properly. You should replace this file (located at /var/www/html/index.html) before continuing to operate the properties of bobjects ... well, here I am!!! replacing the file with an extended replacing of the file. the other web site got to be a bit much to handle and so i deleted it because i can but also because time to shove off and make new bird ness mess and undelete it becAUSE it was cooler page design 4real. weeWoo

2026-02-08 ~ 6:35 yes we just had to write a scorcher of an email, which i will not repost. suffice to say alzheimers mom thinks i should go to nash street to get my teeth knocked in. PANIC, just like losing my snap card. well... may as well do it the same wAY... recycle the patch.... if you can move a whole set of wires from an old project to a new project more or less all at once, that is a major success in my book!! the nevenen survival guide yessir it is for myself because i need it but for you too too because you need it too

2026-02-08 ~ 3:35 stick to the varcharz. the birds of cromulence. the contextual marbles.... mmm, stop. too much fun with words. some of these words need to be more serious wires be need to serious words. stop down. calm damaging. wort wait? oh yeah. i should just focus on what i can do wat i have etc {and, really, what DO i have.... it's something special, let me tell ya

2026-02-08 ~ 3:ish terrible marbles. i am terrible. but it's not my fault, i think. i don't have my glasses, you see. i don't. get it hahahahaha

sorry adam you actually came to the hostel and i missed you. maybe if i had my glasses i would have spotted you downstairs, though. and this is kind of my problem. things are so marbles for me problems that shouldn't, or wouldn't ever normally be problems, are now screaming, raging problems... but at the end of the day, I'm having trouble getting toothpaste the last time I'm in jail; what message does that send? I really cannot think of anything I did to make deserve... that. i am arguably a nice person who likes synthesizers and music and rambling about science marbles. when i was in nash street jail my head got bashed in; they had to take me to mass general to staple my scalp back up. and the two CO's were threatening to beat me up more in the hospital so i had to pointedly say PLEASE STOP THREATENING TO BEAT ME UP LOUD ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE IN THE ER TO HEAR IT and they're shushing me, that's rude, be quiet, people are seriously injured in here

this is really where it's like -- fuck it, aren't you amazed i'm nice to people at all? the level of shit i've been through.. and it's still ongoing. so i got actually assaulted while in jail at nash street being held with three counts of assaulting a police officer and shit (i shoved a guy away because i didn't want to be touched?) and everyone just goes quiet when i talk about the trial date and i know wat that means. my alzheimers mom doesn't seem to care that my lawyer doesn't seem to care hasn't even called me i am just going to say i'm getting a new lawyer when court comes

so on top of this existential awful a friend from high school comes by to hello with some protein bars and i'm tunnel vision on a laptop because everything is so marbles it's all i can do to function that much at all. now i am out of money as an extenstion of losing my snap card. and it's sunday please send me money venmo @nevenen

2026-02-08 ~ 9:18 i suppose the soul can be digital, in a way. or i dunno... the point to having a server; an informational home base on the net... i suspect that's going to become an essential thing probably eventually inevitebly neveneditedibly... and i can rewire things a bit like that, you see. isn't it refreshing

unlike the scraping morning chairs the hostel clearing the frog in its throat wwee-woo

2026-02-08 ~ 9am the house of nevenen, yes. it's a middle english verb i found. it caused something to explode in my brain and i regarded that as fortuitous so i noted it down. i was in high school. boston university academy. studying latin. taking classes sneakily with the real college students -- take that, i'm in in high school! on the last day of german class. the one where i learned about windmill cakes being the thing at the 7/11 and anyways... i have an education and here it is and i want to share and part of getting that is my band name.

i stumbled on this verb while reading tolkien because i figured i should read the books before going to see the movie lord of the things because the book is so book that it would be patently offensive to go see the tolkein movie having not... done my homework as a BUA student. so then i'm trying to learn elvish. no, screw that, middle english words. this is ADHD in high school. they let me go roller blade for gym class on the esplenade in between -- it was pretty chill.

...and the word means ~ to say, tell, express [esp. (the truth)], to give a name to and it has good ring to it and it's complicated it's like a program i like this word it's mine it's me. it's a good name to have. a name about naming and namespaces and domains and i have a domain about my domain on which i can put xzhibit memes in your rockefeller skank right about now check it out now. wee-woo

2026-02-08 ~ 2^2*2*2:56 wee-woo. what is this blog supposed to do? what am i supposed to do? i hope it should be clear i'm pretty harmless at this point. from the previous post... yes, i'm actually useful. i'ma set this shit up and publish my notes all nice because it's good business. you know -- creating value. i'm solving this for myself, may as well go a bit further and solve it for everyone else too. what am i protecting? my name. my domain. nevenen.com. wee-woo

2026-02-08 ~ 5:38 while in jail i had many good conversations with a gentleman named sage and he was asking me to... essentially what a CTO does... for a black-first social network... and i'd do such a thing in lieu of rent or whatever, sure. but i realized: you know what, i can set my own darn website that's not dependant on fartbook or tiktoke and algore riddims that filter what's seen and what... 'snot. i can also write up a guide on this for sage and others like him. i think it is an idea that is very current; very 2026 -- run your own damn site [[i am having a blast writing the html and CSS manually because i've been doing that for a living for years and it's kind of like a painter just relfexively mixing up... oh, i want a bit of this, a bit of that... when i do style sheets]]. and yes, let me try to write up some manuals and maybe make some canteen money that way because teach a man to fish and all that... because i also want it for myself, i'll get into running communications too, email server. one of my specialities is actually video and i'm a musician and this is my music band name, nevenen [wee-woo] so that'll too but not now i just wanted to explain my general arc now that i'm starting to have more of a brain. i'm going to go back and edit the whatever and actually the etc. a bunch brb

2026-02-08 ~ 3:07 i want a zig but there's an ambuluence outside. goddamn crackheads. can't a wiz-ard-bird have a smoek in piece u clowns get off my hostel lawns wee woo

2026-02-08 ~ 02:29 so it's a bit much and the way you deal with that is to say it and.. i will probably also have to get into some panful ugly discussions about race and stuff but promise to be... an engineer, essentially. a scientist about it. to not take sides. and i use humor to take the sting out of it all. that's really a great pleasure of mine. i tear into things with delicious amusement, to hilarious results, etc. but i really am frighted of the nashua street jail. and their infrastructure is even worse, let me tell u buddy

anyways, it's a lot to process and manage, and meanwhile -- i'm still a meatsack that will eventually need to be fed and showered. the upside of that is i can run down the zig smoek a streeterette weet woo back to work. there will be more of, well, that stuff. but mostly not. but it's there. and worse. yep

2026-02-08 ~ 02:29

i corrected yesteday's date to today's wrong timestamp and now i've just fixed that too, thank you very much. even my problems have problrms, you see... and yes, some of the stuff i've written about is a bit much, but being denied toothpaste in jail [and there is another other thing like that too] in my current legal context is actually terrfifying and well yes back to working SSL certficiates because for all i know someone searched and read all my paper notes in jail so let's also teach those clowns to unix. those meatsacks. i will turn you into engineers -- take that. if they're going to read something, it'll be in the voice of nevenen, and it'll be good. we'll defend ourselves and also launch a series of guides on servers and interwebs and shit, yessir. with wires

2026-02-07 ~ 17:54 yes, i am work on survival guide #1 on WIRES; to be published shorly. it is only kind of about wires it is kind of about metaphor and anyways enough for now --

suffice to say that i am dealing with a fucking lot at the moment. on my legal stuff, it is there, on my mind, thanks. meanwhile, onto more urgent matters: I CANNOT FIND MY SNAP CARD!! shit. crap. if you find it please let me know.

it's missing. this is terrible. it's on fire right now -- RIGHT. now

i've repeatedly had myself CALM DOWN and it's not the end of the world. we can call the snap people tomorrow and order a new one... but "call the snap people" is like "call the number precisely at opening and you MIGHT not get a message saying the lines are busy" and then will you get a person that can do Snap Card Things or someone who says "no, sorry, someone else does that and she's not her desk right now"? and etc. but i have a bank card and no one knows my pin so FINE CALM DOWN just note it on the web (hi} and tell the Front Desk People in case it shows up

but despite this reasonable plan, my brain is still tugging off like, "SHIT CRAP MAYBE IT'S right over there," and... no it's not, lizard brain, stop that. it probably fell out as we were tearing down the street. i've already retraced my steps to METHODICALLY to prevent myself from saying "well maybe it's..." and going back out again fifteen times. on thate note -- writing this stuff helps me STFU to myself about it. there are are lots and lots of problems on an ever-convolving pile of Stuff On Fire and these problems lots of crinkles, like the membrane of a cell. which is not actually fluid like the "fluid mosaic" model name led me to believe, darn it -- oh. but, yes, instead -- the membrane can crinkle, and crinkles can create pockets of more product collecting, which leads to piles and spots and... yes, that's more what i'm writing for, to write about. so i can be of some use

yes -- so i can be of some use. i wanted to write up something more relevant and get it off the pile especially after my [actually somewhat legitimate] paranoia in the previous post last night. i was tired and needed sleep. never mind the pile of things on fire; sleep. never mind the snap card, that is already in the queue calm down and one thing at time. let's just dig ourselves out a little, one thing at a time

tonight i am holed up in my own fundament ([hello dakota and other guy i met a the door (who were playing pool earlier <as i was writing earlier&;lt;] becuase if i don't, i will NEVER get anything done; see above>")> writing. i have cocooned myself in The Chair With The Working Ethernet Drop -- it's the little things. i appreciate the functional engineering of the hostel. there is The Stool on which to Sit Down and Take Off Your Boots because They're Wet before promptly thinking your keycard isn't working on the room door [even though it worked on the front door] even though it's just an old keycard we "lost" earlier, in between startling some poor chap who didn't lock the bathroom door. Next, back into the room to mop up the still-there puddle from my boots and get my backpack and down the desk while SHUT UP BRAIN ABOUT SNAP CARD to report my snap card and now write a post like IF YOU SEE MY SNAP CARD please return it. it's not the end of the world, but calling The Snap People be like -- goddamn. now that's enough that maybe i will give people some web links, yes? but i've cocooned myself up here to write more and figure SSL out and generally Word On My Shit and stretch in ways that make people ask questions. It's pretty much what the person does when you're getting a massage, that's the most dead-on engineering gist of it. Once I tried this AI-powered massage chair and I have never worked so seamlessly with a machine in my life. That was beautiful. Especially after I decided to queue up some music my next round on it and dance around with it.

i've been listening to this album "Stream Palette 6" {DVSP-0315} and i need music, like a grid, to calibarate my movements... and yes, i do mess up sometimes. i lose my snap card and think i've lost my room card but PROCEDURES and i recover the room card and enough of the order surrounding the snap card to box the problem in and we can move on. because moving that way, yes, i drop things. that's why i have all the pockets. and they're stable enough in arrangement... it's amazing how times i've NOT dropped something running down the street with them all open. but that's why they all have margin for error. sometimes i slip and fall down, but not often... and when i do, there's a procedure for that to box the problem in and generally nothing of too much consequence happens. i've certainly suffered some legendary injures, but those were painful lessons and keeping balance is a required platform on top of which robot dancing can be built. so if i start to slip i reflexively cut the crap and focus on staying upright. and general policy, like i need to wear the boots if i'm carrying the backpack because as much as i love the jungle mocs they are inherintly unstable, tilty shoes [that's the fun of them, really] and they don't have the ankle support and with the backpack weight it's easier to enter a bad feedback loop and faster and faster out of control until we ACCERATE ACCELERATING and calculus has no mercy as we faceplant into the sidewalk like a cartoon character. and shit, what went wrong there? let's put in multiple barriers to ensure this does not happen again -- and, should it anyways, let's ensure it's at least minimized... but after that, let's mimizing minimization, because that's about all we can do in life. pass the buck like a proper gentleman. yessir

i'm stopping this post now. before it gets any longer. i'ma Work On My Shit [expect the mostly finished guide #1 soon (and it's really going to be more like an e-zine i think)]. but i wrote up an article before going out [to lose my snap card (shit, shit, shut up brain)] before CVS closes beucase we've finished enough of this pocket that we can close it now and not waste egregious time on context switches within context switches and... i'm adding this on the end of my post after copyediting my post; time to stop posting about posting after copyediting the statement about copyediing. I'ma Work On My Shit. write now. ok. yep. also hello to the boy in the cathat again. yep

edit: and edit it fix the timestamp. this all charmingly done by hand in the good ways.. and the bad
edit edit: shit, shit, the george carlin CSS class, still need to do that too
edit edit edit: shit, i'm missing. from the problems about my problems. that i was supposed to... suppose about working on working on, on-est... yep. my laptop just died because i did all the things including plug the brick into the wall and the wired ethernet, check, but NOT THE CABLE INTO THE LAPTOP. and i was just logging into my email to do an ACTUAL THING. let's try again

2026-02-07 ~ 12:48 GYU SURVI=V-ALXTREME SURVIVE, DARN IT. i've reallly had to remind myself of this sometimes, or I wouldn't be here. now the way out is through and we're in the thick of it im afraid so grab your nevenen survival guide to guide your survive through the gide. nevenen survival guide, number 1 ~ how do you get anything done with all these wires? try getting anyyhing done without 'em yessir put that in your district and smoke it

2026-02-07 ~ 12:38time to wat. wat am i supposed to do. weet. woo
mutherfuckerrrr
i swear i just smelled crack through the hostel window as a cop car met a towncar kinda far wasn't a towncar but SMELL THE CRACK and they talked a while. i keep thinking of the name jagba. i still smell the crack. i am familiar with crack in that i am regularly flustered with its periphery. no one has sucked y dick in years and now nash street wants me as a rApe slave potentially for crackheads potentially. why else would... marbles, alice. marbles APLENTY

2026-02-06 ~ 19:25 time to catch up a big. i mean, i declared the existance of a css class called simply "george-carlin" and then i was in such a hurry i didn't even put in a set of empty brackets. if time were available i would be unable to not amuse myself by metamorphasizing george carlin into a CSS class. QUANTUM COMPUTER! crush george carlin into a CSS style

i only trouble this magnificent machine with the most important problems

2026-02-06 ~ 13:44 now what? i don't know. what i do know is that the laws of phsyics are unarguable. if you come to me with some idea that flies in the face of thermodynamics [lisa.....\~ in THIS. HOUSE.] the nevenen bird respects theormdynamics yessir engineering is called so for a reason work heat and wat not; waste not want wat, etc; the business. hell is infrared waste heat a gravity hole, the hole, which does have an actual gravity hole; it's like a vacuum toilet. from space. it's the best bit of kit the jail has, the toilet system. an octopus? she won't flinch. go ahead and flush an octopus bro. but i'm not sure what i ever did to deserve this level of compemplating this level of guru meditation plumber, but let me tell u, there is a magical machine somewhere in the jail that makes all the toilets work and i shit you not, i bet you the thing will actually be pretty cool if/when i finally set eyes on it. like, oh: that's how they coded this one. how is the vacuum... anyways. i still worry about nash street and toothpaste and crackheads because the obvious end like of what use you are without your teef in jail? but don't be suicidal or we'll take away most of your food and put you in the turtle suit buddy. and this one has EXTRA flecks of mattress foam greeble fart to stick all over your skin. this is what you get for making the lawyer feel he is obligated to speak with you urgently instead of at his own pace -- you did this to yourself, buddy... the C.o. is telling me. It's my fault that i've rolled this: the music of bees, naked, flourescent lites, mice, don't do it again. no sir. i won't even think about suicide again sir. i know how against the rules it is

reallly.... you're a piece of shit, humanity. particularly contemptable are the ones that tell a nevenen he's lucky to have a fucking toothbrush at all. but you yourself, in your presumably prim and proper housing [or not]. the internet has a term for this, and we really need to borrow it here: the nevenen ain't no shitlord and he don't truck with no shitlords lawdy nosir. some of the gentlemen {[(using the term loosely)]} in jail REALLY. ARE. complete pieces of shit, yessir, thank you very much.... but what's the line? even the the worst piece of shit is just a piece of shit and stop, man, it's fucked up. and the food is fucked up, as well as the dental care and the mental care at least the cameras work i would probably not be alive and writing without them for real. thank gosh for technology. please also see my tiktok videos of how america responds to everything by sending an armed tactical team to extract you from your hotel room with devious clever tools. the bastards really came prepared for full-scale dimensional war because suck my dick this hotel smells like poop i don't have my glasses fuck your witholding charge and shove the smell of crack in the lobby up your fudament because it's kind of a paisley smell not bad but it means there are crackheads around and goddamn their asshole shit. stop cracking around, hotels. get my lawn off. wee woo

2026-02-06 ~ 13:44 a hardcore mix of leekspin girl song clashes murdeously with the gentleman playing pool who caught bit of the key of the previous track floating out of my headphone and he's still on that my gosh sorry sir shuffle mode just got u pretty bad. i know the feeling. dudley was... fine? are things fine? i don't know. i'm not in jail; that's good, wee-woo. but are they just savoring me to roast me proper for the really bad one? i really feel i've been through enough. multiple multi-week penal experiences for what should have been overnighters because PROCEDURE and that's almost as irritating as their broken-ass computers. and while i appreciate not getting shanked, the antishank toothbrush, as it's described in the canteen menu... hard to brush your teef with. but, fuck, i was having problems before all this. INSURANCE COVERS A CLEANING ONCE A YEAR and welll what if i have a cavitINSURANCE COVERokay you said that i don't think i do but what if hIF YOU ARE FEELING PAIN YOU CAN GO TO AN URGENT CARE CENTER AND PAY $500 FOR THEM TO MAKE YOU WAIT AND TRESSPASS U FROM THE PROPERTY that's the donald trump VIP medical american treatment, yessir. in truth it's not personal, the whole system is pretty murderous at this point. we all have microplastics in our bodies everywhere, right? nothing has melted down, so it's... fine... i guess? how do we feel about our symbiosis with plastic earf? i don't know. but maybe microplastic is what turned RFK into a fucking mutant. banning food dyes won't fix anything, by the way -- but i support it because the changes will really screw with consumer habits in a way i'm certain i'll find amusing so yes please ban them. i'm not sure how to feel about all sorts of things we're actively cooking up and throwing into the world sauce like DNA molecules that, like... yes, it's a G! ...but the other. hand. and everyone sucks in a deep breath

integrity of sampling, it matters yessir. as does chirality. and dental insurance that forces you to strategically deploy your tooth care versus potential for a cavity versus emergency fund and time versus money versus marbles but the other children have eaten all my marbles and i'm starving with an alzheimers mom and mom's money doesn't even near make up for this please send me some money so i can do something nice with it. for myself first, obviously, but i think what i'm feeling now is like.... you bastards, EAT ELEGANT INFRASTRUCTURE!!1 it's best thing to take the wind out of your sails. aren't we tired of fartbook asking to scan our face? well we can make our own damn websites weewoo you can too but i'ma journal the journals into guides i think on how to haus a website of cromulence. BIRDS OF CROMULENCE! isn't that a great band name? i have a thread on a forum where i just post band names. i have been working on it for years it is quite a marble; it feels like an obligation sometime but no it is an indulgence.... or is it? I've had to fight to brush my teeth. I think I've earned a bit of farting up the tubes of the internet

2026-02-06 ~ 08:35:??

3y 2026-02-06 ~ 08:25:?? this car hostpot wifi is succulent it's spoiling me. i need one of those FOR DUDLEY RESIDENTS ONLY wifi hotspots. i tried to get one out of the library myself, but well... i do have a dudley library card now!! yessir. libraries are good marbles, i just wish the ethernet drops in dudley library were real. i almost cried when i saw them... like... this is a library they'll have a fat pipe omg omg and... i came back with a patch cable nextc7 day, yessir, walked the whole mile over again. only to find it was not actually connected to anything. haha just like jail :(

but anyways, actually my biggest complaint about jail is being cut off from music. like, i have been pretty much entirely, every time. i'm listening to USAO again and he is killing it again please email me or something d00d digitalskillet at the gmail but soon i'll have my own email with all the the very important wires like... shit, what were they called again? SPF? yes. not only is it a rating for suntan lotion, but the namespace has super-collided its here hshes to... something about preventing spam, really. then there's also DMARC but i think DKMS or DKIM or some marble is part of... POP or IMAP, maybe? web search says it's blood cancer which, thankfully -- i'm pretty sure my linux doesn't have

running your own email server used to actually be kind of whatever but now it's even harder than running a SECURE webserver with a proper certificate to make it all official on the google and shit. how do you get anything done with all these wires, you might ask??? ...good question; yessir. but try getting anything done without 'em

2026-02-06 ~ 08:??:?? omg i can update my website from a car!! we are in the future, yessir. i am hailing from an arch linux on the the thinkshark larptop running the arch linux, which eventually found the existence of something called an iphone -- a thing i used to have myself, yessir -- because i hailed this car with a ten year old android brick that STILL WORKS [but not with linux yet] and so this means i can have linux in the car, amazing!! that this is actually something i would fantasize about on long car rides in the 90s and 00s... like, man, if i had a cell connection. i could dial in and write something on my blog. i also remember a week or two after fatboy slim's rockefella skank blew up in the US and i managed to jam an MP3 of it on my EVEREX FREESTYLE WINDOWS CE PDA and it used pretty much all the free storage space the thing had and i had to re-encode the mp3 down to like 48kbit for that but I HAD FATBOY SLIM ON A POCKET TOUCHSCREEN DEVICE IN THE YEAR 2000 take that iphone... heck, ipod. which i also had. the ipod was amazing. then the phone was amazing; to consolidate devices into one. nowadays i actually like a separate device as a music player because the smartphone too many marbles i need just a big dumb golden retriever of a device for a music player that just dives into my crates and picks something with a good beat. now it's terrifying watch people grow up with phone and... you idiots. the internet is a bubble where everything is on your terms. don't like the conversation? find another. don't like someone? close the window. in person interaction doesn't work that way and social media makes you feel like you're meeting people but you're increasingly silo'd in and in real life someone might tell you to fuck off because he's a crazy guy who idolizes the fucking pigeons and he thinks you're going to kick the pigeons when anyone who knows a nevenen birb knows i merely troll pigeons. they get way too in my personal space, yo. so i will tailget them sometime. walk up behind them until pigeon starts walking away. keep walking. pigeon keeps walking. pigeon walks faster. i walk faster. HOW DO YOU LIKE IT PIGEON?! i've given a bird or two a hard think about their behaviors yessir. real life is like that and because the internet is satisfying and easy and real life is always a messy gamble people get trapped in amber, i feel. or i did, for years. i broke out of it and developed social graces... but watching a whole generation do it; goddamn it. you kids are supposed to be out stealing dad's alcohol and catching STDs or something. what's wrong with you? i'm going to good and old fashioned dudley now where there is no internet it is like a time warp to the 90s, yessir. suits me just fine; i miss the 90s right about now with all the AI shit

2026-02-06 ~ 01:37:?? bothering the ear of the chap in the hostel mess hall, a long and tortured saga. but i'm alrite. wee-woo. yes, i've done lots of messing around with unix and wires, yessir, and i am proud to say NOTHING WORKS but the good news is i didn't break any shit either. so i've powered down the fancy SSL i've actually paid for this time with disappoint because i haven't gotten it quite right and these things are very persnickity and now it's time to haul myswlf into the fine court of dudley. i really hope they do not send me to jail again. west boylston was pretty bad mang.... but they did have MOTHERFUCKING TOOTHPASTE, yessir they had that one in spades bless them. thanks worstsore counter corrections office. i spent three weeks there back in july, a bunch of it in ~the hole~ which there, well, it's pretty bad. and don't even mention suicidal. you will be PUNISHED that is unacceptable feeling you will promptly be thrown into a locked room wearing nothing but the "turtle suit" suicide-proof mattress clothing, under glorious 24-hour neon light that you cannot shut off. since suicide, the awful too small meals do not come with antishank cutlerly. instead it's a foldy bit of cardboard, and, actually --- it's fine you can eat the 15 kernels of corn pop with it or no it's just krispie flavorless. want toilet paper? you'll need to be polite and strategic. you do not have to wear the turtle suit and last time i opted to just take it off and sit naked in the cell as mice came in and out. i eagerly finished the book i was given -- "the music of bees" actually a good read -- both because it was a lifeline out of that hellhole, but i also wanted a shot at killing the mouse with the book and i wanted to finish the book first because it was good and if it had mouse blood on it i might just decide it was unreadable, or more likely it would then be confiscated because mouse blood is a forbitten substance in worscer county and there's also a rule against break the rules that's another ten days in the hole mister yessir. fear not, animal and book lovers -- i got one shot, for real. after forty minutes of being perfectly still. the little bastard... was fine... so was the book. i missed. wish me luck in court today

2026-02-06 ~ 01:37:?? Privacy Badger has replaced this Disqus widget i don't want either of these things in my web expiernece, thank you very much sir!! who is putting badgers in my web page anyways, even if they are tasked with maintaining privacy?! why have the badgers been necessitated in the first place, hmmm? you greedy corporate sops. go back to using a timeshare or something. for... well, i figure the people who idolize money have a thing they plow it into so they can say "ya" and play around sometimes and everyone picks their bubble. and instead of a vacation house with an expensive sound system that sits idle in cape clawed for most of the year just have a timeshare in florida that does not require crookedness to afford. all of these things are obviously to a birb but no on elisten to me

i have to remind myself: stay calm, hack unix. because if we get linux on the gaia phone we will have a linux phone and linux everywhere and then we'll be a proper precocious lad. but also the SSL shit, time for some me; my domain, nevenen.com etc

2026-02-05 ~ 10:182? it is a goo(f|d) nite at the hostel yessir. now that we calm and about our bidness, wee-woo dat-doo data poo. i have a heck of a lot of paper on my desk and we're clearin the tables very reasonable bidness marbles.... business means marbles, because marbles roll.. in time. thats what the great sage george carlin said.... and so [because this is my website and not facebook] in the house of nevenen george carlin has been canonized in a holy css class which i will create later alothwitng along with many other fings

2026-02-05 ~ 03:35? 1:04? i'm very good at planning. i make very good plans. but plans are dangerous; things change. we're running on an expired plan? the means we're executing reality that doesn't exist. wiley coyote doesn't know he's over the cliff... where was i? yes. the guy said the mail place open on thursday when i asked at the booth. that vaguely rang a bell that no, the pine street rec center is not open on thursday morning. suffice to say i didn't listen to that voice and went there to ask my hedphones about today. which are still in their clitches. the guy is like... come back tomorrow. yes, that's more the program, friday sounds like a more cromulent day to get my shit. wee woo. when? 8. how late they open? 8:30 9 and numbers are wandering off down the street good luck buddy here are some numbers pick them off the airwaves and smoke them. i have court tomorrow and it seems like this one i won't go to jail i hope? but anyways it's monday for trying for my hedphones also my unlocked android replacement phone there too that's just how the marbles wanted it. i bodged this logistic for some synchronjstic raisin and dammit, but.. let it play out. meanwhile, i have plenty to play with. and i do have working hedhpones and a working phone... even if the hedfones can't make me feel cybergoth like the buds do they still play beats and it's a ten year old android phone but it's unlocked and rooted and i think i am going to put linux on it and use linux as my phone. and the end result will be... how describe.... oh, *teacher scowls* "that's a very interesting pokemon you've created there" becuase child drawing hentai guro or something

meanwhile i shadowed some shy asian boy on the way back from that. now it's back to work on the marbles; always the marbles. a shower is definitely somewhere, i have food to eat, two undrink'd C4 [hhaaiiawiwiawaPONCweewoO] this laptop is on the battery what was my before 4 a gend uh ug-gain? UGHHH said someone in the hallway 2, woooeooeo roo hello

2026-02-05 ~ 03:35? 1:04? i freaking hate everything. none of this crap is working... i mean, i can get this eventually, but now it's 3am and dammit. stupid amazon going to the wrong places and what the fuck i used to have a job and nice shit and they may just send me to fucking nash street again anyways. i'm so sick of jail people and their inability to appreciate the glory of the unix operating system and i'm also sick of crackheads they're fucking irritating assholes. stupid society trying to kill me and telling me to appreciate my alzheimers mom and her emotional violence

well i don't hate this website actually it's ok. i hope i can keep working on, like, computers. the whole last time i was in jail i was PARTICULARLY like ~ in ADDITION to being able to EXERCISE PROPERLY and BRUSH MY TEETH and EAT HEALTHY FOOD i would really like to work on computer stuff i don't hate it either even though i hate how the results are marbelizing now. rats

2026-02-05 ~ 01:13? 1:04? it's the littleist horseshit nail that.... timekeeping, what a hoot. how do you sync computer timestamps if we have computers in space and on the moon? well whatever we do, we all have to AGREE. so it's a problem that my watch disagrees with my laptop with what i timed at the typestamp. but no, really. roger penrose was right, goddamn it. took me twenty years to turn my marble round on that one. heard it in college: "consciousness needs a quantum computer; possibly other things" and yes this penrose character probably believes mushrooms are interstellar travellers or some shit -- because his theory flies in the face of parsimony. bleeding thing is complex enough; now you have to go and make it quantum? NO. SIR and about twenty years later.... the penny drops, and dammit. DAMMIT. this is science for you -- some theories have lasted, like, seven years, and then one day ~ "no i'm an idiot, i was an idiot for seven years, goddamn it. oh well" and then i throw a theory that lasted seven years out because no, that was very ~creative~ but you've gotten a fundmental problem here and that is FIDDIX, physics. about all religions have the idea of reciprocity. do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, do unto others as you would have others do to you, and what have you, et cetera, the business. once i caught onto this it was a dark night where a lot of very creative but wrong science got burned down in a bonfire of blunts. but obviously... I HAD NEW IDEAS FROM THE EMBERS!! where was i?

right. so if you view blood flow as direction of resources, that will be shaped by evolution, because direction of resources. you max out first year calculus and related rates and diffusion and that's all the computation you can do with blood [but it does have some neat tricks, let me tell ya!]. from there you evolve a nervous system to most efficiently direct blood flow. once you've used evolution to max out the classical computer, the only place you can go is quantum ~ and you get theory of mind; strategy. information about information is structure. thinking about thinking is productive, but thinking about thinking about thinking is goulash because we can only bodge one quantum ground state at a time; analyze all possible paths of neural fire. pick the best one. the ground state. probability curve. binomial marbles. well if plants do it for photosynthesis... but no, it's this ~

dancing. i am a dancing bird, wee-woo iz fun. but there quite often things where i sort of giggle to myself and think "it'll be interesting to see that one resolves" because the marbles say yes but it's just a meta-configuration of puppet strings and it's so complicated i'm actually not sure what exact pattern of motion my limbs will take... no, no, not like that, you dolts. it's that i've specified parameters and gotten the ok and it's going down the pipeline and ahaha oh that's funny that's clever what it did there wweewoo

i remember i was 21 and i'd just tried this thing called LSD right as i took classes on robot arms. artificial intelligence, yessir -- pity dana ballard passed, he probably would have loved this turd of a website. he was a wonderful lecturer [imagine this funny voice little man with the world's messiest macbook desktop loudly saying] "...nevermind, i'm going to sell my TV, because I WANT SOME CRACK" and this is because he explaining what dopamine receptors do, yessir... it was a lecture one or two before or after that one that he had us read penrose and i promptly laughed it off. then yes, i was stoned and i was eating pringles and i had a problem. i like the flavor particles on certain areas of my tounge for maximum enjoyment of each pringle, and the powder is distributed by somet unfathomable machine [raymond scott's powerhouse plays, homer simpson bowling pins etc] and it can be in any of one, two, three, four QUADRANTS, yessir. i name the QUADRANTS because this is science, and science is serious, yessir. i think thought about the homework i'd been doing earlier on how... well, if you have an arm with N joints, computing all possible paths of motion is O(n^3) because one two three dimensions, n the jumber of joints... ["POTLOADS of joint probability" i noted the daft marble Chris Brown yelling in my notebook next to mushroom doodles]....

anyways. i sat there and i came up with a pre-planned pattern of motion that allowed me to analyze the pringle and smoothly rotate it with minimum motion all at once no matter which quadrant. i used my robot arm homework to annihilate how i enjoy pringles, yessir. i was so chuffed i set my AOL away message to something like "thanks to being stoned, i have managed to optimize the complex inverse kinematics involved in eating pringles" and hello to lamerd00d, adam norwood, wee-woo, yessir

...so anyways, because MATH... the level of shit my dancing marbles can do.. yeah, that fucker has to be quantum. because i melt the fuck out of classical computation while eating junk food from seven eleven. i am a quantum computer made of meat, and you are too, wee-woo. now what'll u do. wit urs

2026-02-05 ~ 01:12 progress! or not. on things... and stuff. will they just throw a nevenen bird again in jail again and maybe steal some of my teef this time? what am i supposed to accomplish anyways? i don't know. i do feel there's something in telling people, like, look -- you don't need facebook. you can have your own web site. your own way. because you know what you're doing with all these wires. yessir

i find the work satisfying but it has very real grounding in coherent tactics, varcharz -- not just german mysql tables, but WATCHATZ.. no, wait... voresharks... er, rorsack? WAR CHARTS. BATTLE PLANS. wee woo. it's the business. yessir

2026-02-04 ~ 22:12 update: grr. footnote: grrr. progress: i neeed a cigareggeetetetweeowowow

2026-02-04 ~ 19:12 i know what i'm doing. with all these wires and things... yessir.. but no, everything is always more like: i've accidentally shipped things to the homeless shelter so in between trying to stop the phone from getting there too etc etc TLDR STFU ~~ newayze~getting kali nethunter going on the gaia phone has shot up from "that's a hoot" to "oh shit now i'm kind of cornered" and i know what i'm doing, yessir, calm down. magisk doesn't work; panic again. we don't need it? perhaps we don't need it. promptly joggle the usb cable loose during part 5/6 of flashing the phone and shit a brick. we know what we're doing. all these wires and shit. yessir

2026-02-04 ~ 121

weeWOOOtehfuk. i mean, i love seven eleven. they're pretty much the main stem rite now. my lifeline. thanks for all the hours.... but i was chatting with them about how, yes, i've eaten all of [item full of sugar and partially hydrogenated soybean oil shaped like german windmill cookies and called a zebra cake in vanilla] please order more and... INSTEAD, you want me to get stuff, what... DELIVERED? from seven eleven? that would rob me of the xercise i get going over there talk about being disconnected from ur consumer dafuk u sending me di semail4 weewoo

i mean. without my glasses, navigation is dicey. i've gotten lost for hours, no joke... and i'm pretty much [this is fine] about it when that happens. okay, this is what these stupid meatsacks have done to me. they get what they get and i'll find the results somewhat amusing if i do say so myself... but yeah, i have to find the t-mobile store today. i wandered into homegoods earlier todat because it looks exactly the right color and proportions to be a tmobile blob but no it's not tmobile it's homegoods shit wrong store walk back out like we meant it yep

but seven eleven is a direct shot from the hostel and the glasses don't matter and the CVS gymnasium is just around the corner too. has the snow melted off the bike racks across from el jefe's? i'm almost up on my parkor marbles enough to start manipulating those like a boss again again again da reps

2026-02-04 ~ 1250 yes i promised some trax? i mean i wrote music when i had time... since i'm obviously overtoo encumbered now to music... but fuck you, i'm a beaST with a tracker that's where the marbles roll for rail yeaaa so there are buncun a bandcramp codes for free download of quality acid heartbreak marbles. over an entirely different spotty cat arc in like 2015, i shit you not
https://epicmegatrax.bandcamp.com/track/nothing-good

2026-02-04 ~ 11fiddy9inTHEam i need a new css for tik tok drop and a word. that i didn't get it at first, but tiktok was the only app that let me scrub around and as a musician, get the needle drop just rite. being able to start the song at the precise moment... and then they also smashed together twitter tumblr instagram facebook and youtube... oh nice a good universal expression toolkit... now the US has taken it over and i am discovering all the good music i used on my previouis videos has been replaced by shitty pop music and that's why tiktok now thinks i like that shit, because the US bought tiktok and the music licensers are fucking bitches and ruined all my vids and HEY WE CAN ACTUALLY PROFIT OFF THIS TOO and shove shitty trap music into my videos... which i will just delete when i can. you bastards. i had a specific needle drop for a specifcififif j=core moment and christ.... how many vids did they gut? ...but anyways, USAO send me an email please we need to chat

2026-02-04 ~ 944am i need some coffee and a stretchhh weeWoo

2026-02-04 ~ 846am did u noe ~ microwaves are the enemy of wifi!!1

the two industries evolved in their own spaces and neither gives a shit about each other, but guess what also doesn't give a shit? THAT'S.RIGHT.KIDS.~it's-fiddix. like, the laws of physics. the shit you can't mess with. after all the talk.... either the molecules are there and the reaction happens... or they aren't, and it doesn't. so whenever you turn on a microwave it happily spews broadband garbage noise allll over your faster wifi spectrum. i once sat and watched, a floor above the microwave, as my wristwatch timer told me when the microwave's magentron would turn on [it's duty cycle -- you know how the power setting on a microwave works, yes?] and sure enough the j-core i was pirating went from 20 megaybtes a second to 10. fuck i miss having the infrastructure to leech that hard. now i'm not even sure i have disk that weather such :(

2026-02-04 ~ 538am it's hard to no wat u do when u dont no wat ur doin

i get up every day and i try and take care of my self and brush my teef if i am allowed and eat healthy foods i choose like bananas peanuts rxBars milk weeWoo instead of jail constapation hemmmeroids express messy

and society is broken stop trying to tie me to a toilet until i die

[i'll be here, like... picking up a bodge target drop tomorrow; unlocked cheap NEW from amazon fuck apple for the moment it's a hybrid solution for a <hybrid situation on a hybrid fucking planet shit goddamn (son {plz})>]

and if you give me half a moment to fix your fucking computer.... you're welcome

anyways i hope it's clear i'm coherent so please treat me better ok
but the robot dancing really can be a problem. it can cause a situaion. AN INCIDENT. accusations that i am on... substances... weeWoo, so are you probably; judgy judge etc here we go

muscles need to be used every day or the cells die and atrophy and it bothered me very much watching my body that i had worked hard for die while i was in jail and to come out a skeleton blob with fuzzy teeth

but the robot dancing really can be a problem. it can cause a situaion. AN INCIDENT. but i actually need to work out all the tension i develop -- you can watch it develop -- as i tensely hack my computer shit. if all i did was unix yes i would be a fatass; hell i used to be a fatass it was deplorable now i am a sexy nevenen bird weewoo. i am an interdimensional traveller [time, space -- those are dimensions so i technically qualify for the label; to hell with your guffaws\\\]] and it worries me that i don't have an umbrella because i like to have everything. i need. to set up high tea in space, or under the ocean. once you realize the power of instant coffee and leverage the concept of pouches, things get complex. you wind up arresting a bird who could serve you coffee from his wallet because, well, i never know what bare minimum grab bag selection of my stuff i will get back when i get out of "custody" so let's make it count. this also has marbles rolling with respect anyone attempting to simuluate me, including myself. hello. wee-woo

but the robot dancing really can be a problem

what a stupid planet where i have to make an ass of myself just to try and physically recover from the shit jail did to my body

...but i dislike moping arond. i usually don't complain at all. but i'm tired of being full of ya'allshit

2026-02-04 ~ wee woo. some people can be ppretty caustic on the internet. some bird told me, and i quote: "accept that your mental health bar is at 0.00001%"

what a rude thing to do. to attempt to cast a spell on a nevenen bird. my mental health bar is fine, no thanks to you stupid cunts who think i'm a toothless aspie. these people have actively fucked my life up with their bullshit and it is horrible and i want it to stop. you dumb bitches

because really. i order a new phone and i get a cracked phone and alzheimers mom does actually manage to get my heart rate up very slightly with that panic attack of an email; that hosebeast laser spam

[please see the discussion of how your teeth are treated in jail below and try and argue with my belief that humanity is trying to kill me slowly and painfully]

what scares me is that the fucking court shit is going to run on some creaky scary infra and i was literally in a cell and i hear about computer problems and these fucking trolls really could have a problem with court computer and PROCEDURE and the pieces of shit would keep me in jail because the computer is down. let me fix your fucking shit so it doesn't rape me. you idiots. you morons

meanwhile i've lost the thred of trying to upload some bandcamp so maybe i can not lose another thred and i'll upload some trax dammit

2026-02-03 22:44:66 ~ it is hard to be a secure informational commuter these days, yessir -- i'm wooking at less esh aich... sorry, um.... I'm looking at SSH hardening web bits and I turn some stuff on and then I get compliants that I was NO LONGER QUANTUM SAFE oh no. so i turned it back off and left the default. i just assume the good folk at akamai etc know what they're doing. because, yes, i perhaps am smart enough to understand.... whatever the fuck the problem is up there, with post-quantum circular ed's in virtual circular space i don't the fuck know wee-woo. I stand on the shoulders of giants, like anyone. I'm just trying to set things up solid... and it's a real pickler: which side is telling the truth? running $ ssh-audit doesn't like some of the algorithms akamai set me up with at all, but when i put some other options in, ssh warns me on connecting. when it was clear it was an issue, just shut it off don't type in the password whatever and

it matters because if i am going to set up SSL certificates i should have my SSH tubes not leaking first, and.... now it is my turn to say fuck off, you will never understand, i solve what matters and stop there, and it matters i look at this because things down the chain matter on it no matter wat that's wat they say -- the stickers say wat

i still don't have a working phone. theoretically that is showing up tomorrow. how would t-mobile react if i brought them a fone with kali nethunter? wee-woo i nevenen bird and i don't know; i just know i work here on the wires and the wires and the wires and also the wires

2026-02-03 22:44:66 ~ my computer and my phone disagree on the time, so i feel it fair to specify an invalid time. HA! so there

having emails from my disoriented mother about a court date tomorrow does not help matters at all. it was cancelled and she has it messed up... but when you ask the case manager in jail to Look Shit Up for you, you need to specify the COUNTY or he will simply search the district the jail is in. it is possible i have some court date i don't know about in some district i don't know about and they will issue a summary bench warrant -- but most likely not. my court date is soon, but no -- thanks anyways, alzheimers mom. please stop writing emails and... yes, switch to drinking. as we've DISCISSED. BEFORE

anyways, i have just had a workout and now i am going to keep working out my logistics issues; thanks

2026-02-03 20:22:XQ ~ [info] hybrid key exchange based on post-quantum resistant algorithm and proven conventional X25519 algorithm -- now that's what I like to see. Not only is it post-quantum (*see tangent), but in order to write about it after copy pasting about it i have to create another CSS style

* tangent
because the people who work at the NSA are not stupid, and you'd be stupid not to (nevenen-bird names this "the [the pigeonhed principal]") the NSA will have a giant liquid-cooled data silo buried in the desert somewhere hoovering up all the internet traffic (like wiretapping the whole internet) it has the capacity to store in an organized manner, with obvious beams of focus on economics and international concerns, etc. and since all of this is encrypted they cannot simply open it up and read what's going on... but once quantum computers are practical, they will be able to go back in time and decrypt anything they want. selectively, mind you -- they have to decide to go back and look at something specific. but they will be able to. if they've been hoovering up the encrypted comms. which they are because they're not stupid... so they will someday... if we don't destroy ourselves and/or our planet before developing viable [non-human **see other tangent] quantum computers... and then maybe THAT will get us if we make it that far anyways, because while the people at the NSA aren't stupid, so are the equivalent people in russia and china who are also working on quantum computers and....

** I am a walking, squalking quantum computer made of meat, and that is fantastic -- fact. i'll save proving that for later, though. we don't have the margins

2026-02-03 19:42:00

there is a lot of paperwork for the nevenen to figure out. SSL means a CSR and... ooh, what is this? actually enjoy this sort of rubber-stamp architecture. but it does take a lot of time learning the keychain. for this, seven-eleven has provided a level of sugar which, hopefully, will not outrun the system pancreas. or whatever does that.... oh, another thing to lose 45 minutes reading about on bad boy wiki p[dia]; bother

2026-02-03 19:26:00

we are feeling sufficiently saucy that we have created two new CSS styles: fancier-timesamp and new-newsflash. the idea of handcoding the index page for your TLD may be new{S} to sum; now u noe

Hello,

As per company policy, when non-guests inquire about having a meeting with an individual staying we are unable to confirm nor deny your presence at the Hostel without prior approval from you. As such, there was an individual insistent upon retrieving an item from you. They have since left as we could not contact you to confirm, and we did not give any information on your presence in the establishment. If this is true, you are always welcome to leave an item at the desk with his name on it, which staff can give to them when they arrive. Otherwise, you will need to organize a meeting time and staff will be unable to assist with your meeting, or even informing if you are a guest. If you are unaware of who this individual is, please let us know so we can keep any eye out. We always aim to help, but in these instances, safety is priority. Best,
Jocelyn

NVN 12:48 AM (18 hours ago) to hostel
yes the "refurbished" iphone amazon sent me is cracked and he was here because it was delivered to his domicile and he kindly brought it in when he came in for work and now he has to return it too. sort of like how he waited for me in the lobby while i waited for him in the lobby [the airlock] and i couldn't see him because my glasses disappeared. and i don't have a phone. and he was just trying to help, so please do not trespass him from the property. he was just trying pick up my property properly because people on amazon be profiteerin' off improperly stupid fractured new broken fondleslab etc etc thank you for both your concern and understanding. getting a cracked phone was just so "ahahah, of course" that i more or less gave up for the day and i didn't see his email saying he was going to stop by the lobby until after he left

i am dozing off and i actually had a little dream about toothpaste i think. or was that c=romulent? DARN IT^H that-wrord has been stalking me!
that word is a real pariah quite a gravity hole you jjerks

harry was in the lobby as i waited for him in the lobby [not taking the piss! i couldn't see he was waiting in the lobby, so i waited in the airlock patiently, after checking for him outside]. first my glasses were broken and then missing,and now they're missing [they're missing], like my iphone, and he gave me my new [old] iphone again again again, which i would promptly find is FUCKING CRACKED.the refurbished iphone i got to replace my missing iphone is CRACKED this is what happens when you are in a city and you need a phone for life and the cheapest tmobile has is $200 android brick so let's a "refurbished" off the amazon and... crap, i guess the house of nevenen just loaned someone $300 for however it takes to get that refunded.

meanwhile, i still have no phone,

to call the lawyers for the court date for the legal marbles etc.i am still waiting for the phone for any number of things like, oh, i may no longer have health insurance
meanwhile mom put $1000 in my account, which is good, because i can... wait, where was i again? no, this is not enough for one month like i asked.... but it is also more than enough to try mIphone luck again on amazon... so I should probably

DEADLOCK
	f u c king dammit.
 
	  this ruins a bodged plan to regenerate an 

	  item on which a hole lotta fings depend

	     requiring their plans to be bodged as well.
 
	bodging all day is such a bother.

and really, planning is not an option with this shit... and at some point i noticed i had landed in an area where enough snow and ice had melted that i could properly dance a bit without impeding pedestrians, so that's what i did. i would have preferred to figure out my health insurance, like, yesterday, but that very much depends on the phone and what will tomorrow bring? weeWoo nevenen bird signing off 4 2ntite

soon harry will drop off my new [old] iphone again again again. then

soon harry will drop off my new [old] iphone again again again. then somehow i have to navigate all the way to newbury street without glasses. it was a charmingly obnoxious challenge at first, but yes -- now, we are __SIGH__.

somehow i have to navigate all the way to newbury street without glasses. it was a charmingly obnoxious challenge at first, but yes -- now, we are __SIGH__.

my dearest mother said she'd have to call the bank when i asked her about the extended stay america emails i sent. we speak again and things have reversed; three thousand dollars?! WHAT HOTEL IS THIS AGAIN? again again. after having to again tell her where i was again again

NVN 11:24 AM (5 minutes ago) to Phéna

  well anyways you don't have to it's pretty glacial out
   but that's how society is killing me --
       well you would give me protein bars but
           you have t go out and get them
            and then bring them here and

  ...notein bars.

    Nevenen
	
11:26 AM (5 minutes ago)
	
	
to Phéna
  but it would get you off the goddamn internet for once. doesn't the internet
  suck now? remember when we wanted to build a go-kart and because the
  internet was [[close]] to being a thing,
  the parts for a gokart were not present in ur parents garage

[...the nascent interwebs wAS already leeching liminal bandwidth in that times[ace!]

NVN 9:22 AM (1 hour ago) to Phéna oh, RXbars. i had a conversation on a forum once that went like..... "I want, I dunnno, amalgamated food" and just do all the things and have it so i can put it in my pocket and be on my [merry] way" and the guy made some comments about difficulty and taste but a few months later "chocolate sea salt rx bars" became a thing and yes, THIS. this was what we meant when we went off that one time on the board; someone has officially solved the problem. You can draw a venn diagram between backpacking and homelessness and general nutrition tac and I live off of chocolate sea salt and bananas at the HI hostel in boston [19 STUART ST BOSTON] ~ you might have to throw something at me to get my attention; i can't see what's going on without my glasses and i'm listeng to j-core too loud to hear u

9:22 AM (1 hour ago) to Phéna oh, RXbars. i had a conversation on a forum once that went like..... "I want, I dunnno, amalgamated food" and just do all the things and have it so i can put it in my pocket and be on my [merry] way" and the guy made some comments about difficulty and taste but a few months later "chocolate sea salt rx bars" became a thing and yes, THIS. this was what we meant when we went off that one time on the board; someone has officially solved the problem. You can draw a venn diagram between backpacking and homelessness and general nutrition tac and I live off of chocolate sea salt and bananas at the [hostel] ~ you might have to throw something at me to get my attention; i can't see what's going on without my glasses and i'm listeng to j-core too loud to hear u

-- dj phena proxima knows better than to spin trap in my house

-- trap music is over. so tired of that drumbeat coating america like plastic out of the microwave burning into the shape of your hand is burning trap music is over that drum beat is over let's breathe free of molten plastic autotune skies please

...weeWOO i use formatted text to make things clear to u

==> wee-woo i am a nevenen-bird. a bird-wizard. welcome to my blind carbon chaos of the cat's mewosores--THAT IS TO SAY you've been blindly carbon copied into my reality and now must suffer my newsletter; this is going out to bunches of people. because, darn it. can ya'll stop trying to kill me, please? that and hacking unix; my coping mechanisms. anyways

..so, yes, we are in the hostel again, money is low^H^H^Hno; it's a fine day to say i pretty much never touch alcohol but as [...a fitting fate for someone who drove me into the drink via a childhood of cruel psychological manipulation? ...mmm, no -- let's call it MOM'S RETIREMENT PLAN; the optics of that will play better]

I think my mom should be prescribed two bottles of wine per day

as an act of mercy for planet earth\

which is apparently terrible for her -- The new windows they put in her $5000/mo place are DRAFTY, darn it, and her labrador pulled a noodle, and... yeah, you see what this woman does to me? ...has done to me? No, right... context is a slippery marble... FINE, you can have the context ~

Salient points include ~

gosh, this weather is challenging for a nevenen bird BECAUSE

@2026-01-29 China[crown\]town[crossing is an amalgamated popsycle; modern art of igloo. mode; we are in igloo mode. So much snow that our sidewalk bandwidth noised down to a narrow channel the width of a stingy yoga mat in places... and I DO NOT HAVE [ANY|MY} GLASSES and I cannot see more than six inches from my face and with this i have to drag an increasing-ly less-roll-y rolling suitcase through people who are annoyed at me for having a suitcase. I don't like it either.

Sleeping in parking garages in November -- that's FINALLY when Mom sent me some money out of the kindness of her hurt [repeatedly shitting myself outside Mass General with food poisoning DID NOT QUALIFY FOR SYMPATHY as I found out!] \

I wish she would send me enough money at once for me to actually get out of this mess. $500 here. $500 there. Always $500.... and that gets a day and a half and a hassle at a half a hotel darn it the shower dun work. Nevenenbird weeWOO let's doo some accountin' toooooo

==line item, my teeth

in jail they don't fix your cavities. They just "extract" the tooth.

So, obviously, we want to brush our fucking teeth in fucking jail, right?

Because we care about out future.... we care about our teeth, which means we want TOOTHPASTE while in jail. Excuse me, kindly correctional officer, may I... oh, you're pretending to not hear me... hello? OK, no toothpaste from the guards. that comes from CANTEEN. for this, we have the, er, "bonus privilege" of a securanustech jail-proofed android tablet ......

FUN FACT ~ if you're on DL, you're banned from the tablet -- which means you have to order the canteen stuff over the phone... somehow.

It probably involves goat's blood and candles [because that's how all they do IT in jail ~ the internet of inmates (and things)]

..... from which the "antishank" toothbrush can be ordered for the princely sum of, um, $0.10....

....or, wait! what about that over there!? hygene kit. $0.00. Free item. That'll re-toothpaste us, right?

HA!!! hahaha no [THAT'S A TRAP SUCKA] they won't send you one that way...

...that, yes. I had to sit there in jail and fucking listen to my mom spew the sort of crap like the below email [and politely let her do it] so she could fumble through the canteen process [after she said she'd do it; failed to because she failed to figure it out] SO I CAN GET TOOTHPASTE IN A WEEK AND A HALF. MAYBE -- we're serious; game face on. work with her on it tirelessly like a customer service rep pro -- but she's mad at the phone and at me and mad at me sighing and i sigh and she's mad, man. the fuck, humanity. this woman has the money to spare, she does -- but she's gone daft with alzheimers. meanwhile, i got arrested because i was disoriented, sleep derprived, {[WITHOUT GLASSES (a former shark without his former glasses)], couldn't see more than six inches from my face [without glasses]} I got arrested because... I wandered into the housekeeping area because I couldn't see because I didn't have my glasses -- goddamn panopticon ~ https://www.tiktok.com/@epicmegatrax/video/7591671767790308638

[[ and I think the night before that I stood all night in a bus stop and shuffle danced to J-Core

and DAMMIT both my dedicated boot-and-play-jcore raspberry pi 4 and my bose bass hose

AND MY JCORE MP3s [AND flacS] COLLECTIONSgrrrr weewoo ]]

//// so I have to let her spew abuse at me and stab me in the hand with a fork [tech support to get the payment to go through] repeatedly only to find CANTEEN MONEYS NEED TO BE IN THURSDAY YO canteen delivered tuesday so you can put money in thursday after thursday so you can get mo' toothpaste to brush yo teef mo' on the tuesday after tuesday

...and given that I managed to perform basic accounting well enough that I managed to brush my teeth in jail [[[I saw these clowns coming, ok? I stretched the tiny crappy tube of toothpaste until i just got out of jail randomly. again. on last wednesday?! with no stuff. again. ...but worse -- this time i have no phone, no ids, no cards, no nothing. i have a pack of peanuts, but i promptly eat the peanuts [because i'd spent all day making sure the peanuts didn't get lost or stolen or confiscated ["some people are allergic to peanuts, you know" a C.o. remarked, I shit you not] in between not being allowed to eat the peanuts. HELLO, C.O. can i have my peanuts with courthouse dungeon tuna sandwich? no? thank you so much weewoo\ .... it's such a relief to finally get the answer i so richly deserve: that no, i may not eat my peanuts {$0.67 from securanustech} until it's the time to wait outside of framingham district courthouse in the ice and snow because no one is available to pick me up!@! ...and pretend we have cromulent methods of payment in CVS in order to avoid neuropathy aka frostbite, and... yes, ma'am? may i use your phone's translator to ask you if i can use your phone? OK SUPER THANKS!! ....what?! a cab? JOG BACK NO GLASSES OVER ICE TO COURTHOUSE hello tommy's ataxia ]]]]]

the taxi brought the nevenen to the COPPERY -- the sausage factory -- you know... ...The Police Station [and that's a fact]

..as the people eventually collecting me had called a taxi for me from the courthouse to the police station and i found this out from the hispanic woman's phone in CVS, while avoiding neuropathy, after using her phone to ask her if i could user her phone, and...

...are you still with me? Right. So I ran back to the courthouse, made the taxi, waited in the police station for a while. Wrote in my journal about the strange noises some [man]'s [child] was emitting (as the [child]'s attempts to imitate the [man]'s less strange noises melted down into failures that were... interesting to producing acid house tracks kind of noises, i guess? ...and, {yes.... adding it up... when can I actually write some music again please?})

Right -- in total, I don't feel like all this bullshit is the best use of my talents; my limited time on planet earth. DO YOU?

I'm doing everything I can to get back to engineering and art -- however!!

! My macbook got stolen, my phone lost, no glasses,

then the overpriced hilton i got right out of jail because NO TIME TO THINK

then i find the shower doesn't work.

then, luckily, the hostel made an "exception" because I ~am~ exceptional [to have survived society's attempts to kill me for so long] No shit people are getting tired of helping me -- and it's scary, but also FUCKING MADDENING :(

https://www.tiktok.com/@epicmegatrax/video/7601649334492482846

I have no idea where I'm going to stay after tonight; Perhaps I'll freeze to death? JUST YOU TRY, YOU FESTERING MEATSACKS -- no, not you, actually. In fact, no one in particular -- I'm just yelling at the clouds; at reality... to generate body heat, so I won't freeze. Because, shit -- how many times have you tried to freeze the nevenen-bird now, reality? HOW. MANY. TIMES?! ....yep, that's right [and that's a lot innit] but still, this could be the one where the fuckers finally et me. if only I'd gone to the social worker who would tell me to go to the full shelter or the closed a while ago shelter but there's still the closed for the afternoon shelter. I've never really cared about who is in charge being that I don't consider authority a valid concept, but I actually kind of wish someone would PUT ME IN CHARGE, DARN IT, so i could fix this crap. you know -- the system. Because the only thing worse than the food in jail is the infrastructure, and that's how Trump likes it, tyvm

[[ since i'm really not sure what to do in between being not sure what to do, i've been doing a lot of UNIX hacking. building icecast, what a charming adventure... expired SSL certificate, you thought I'd forgotten, didn't you? ...it's not stable housing, but it's cheering me up.. and.... pay ubuntu for update marbles?! EAT ARCH LINUX YOU HOSEBEASTS!!4rkbombDamatrix] ]]

please send: COUCH SURFING SLOTS; money, lawyers, catboys, peanuts, a new macbook, sony xm5 earbuds, protein bars, milk, and synthesizers. but mostly money -- because the hotels cost way more than the drugs [Thanks masshealth!! i think you might have just expired amidst all the chaos and i will miss u very much because you pay for my therapist too] and tell the catboys i can't see them i don't have glasses they have to meow at me or something if i am to find them and fill them wit^H^H^H

paypal to digitalskillet@gmail.com

$ricedoutindustries CashApp

@nevenen on venmo

music @ nevenen.bandcamp.com

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: NVN. <nvn>
Date: Sun, Feb 1, 2026 at 7:17 AM
Subject: Re: Future
To: Mom <mom@mom.com>, Mary <Harry> <>

On Sat, Jan 31, 2026 at 6:04 PM Mom <mom@mom.com> wrote:

Hi Geoff,
I need to say a few things. I want you to have a better life. The direction you seem to be
Going in is very scary. I think you have to realize that you can’t say or do whatever you want
To police or anybody else.
Do not buy drugs, or waste the money I sent you.
I want to help you get a smarter plan for the rest of
Your life.
I am not going to keep rescuing you if you keep getting arrested and end up in Jail.
What you are doing is going to leave you without friends or family. That is a very
Sad situation to be in. The people who have been helping you are tired of it at this point.

I will try to get some more help for you, do you still have a social worker or a good therapist?
I will talk to the social worker if you want. I am the only help you have as far as money, and that
Is not ednless. You have to decide you want to change what you are doing. I don’t have all the
Answers, and you need to think about whether you are going to spend a lot more time in jail, or
End up living on the street.
This is extremely serious, and you have choices to make. This is not going to be easy. I wish you
Didn’t have all the court dates coming up, but I think when it is possible, you should not stay in MA.
You are too known to police now, and a new area would help.
I will help you with this when it is possible, but you should avoid getting arrested again, because you
Might not get out of prison the next time. Judges will not look kindly at your record.

Let me know where you are and something has to be figured out for somewhere to stay.

Mom

Mom,

is there a single coherent, constructive thing in that entire diatribe? my vote is no -- except, possibly, wait -- you said it -- what would be constructive is more money

because i STILL DO NOT HAVE GLASSES YOU JERK and i am wandering around boston in ice and snow with a rolling suitcase. this is exhausting and dangerous and i still don't have a phone and have upcoming court dates instead etc -- and in any case, what I really would think makes sense is to just book a month at an Extended Stay America, which is about best bang for the buck and has a good track record in my book, but darn it... just when i thought i was free of it... i'll price it out today. please stop writing emails and switch to drinking.

2026-01-30 ~

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